Light at the End of the Tunnel

Do you ever have moments where you just can’t see the “light at the end of the tunnel” and you feel like you will never get through?  Our family has experienced this for 6 ½ years and just felt like we were having to jump over one hurdle after another with no end in sight.  We prayed for that “light at the end” and just felt like we would never see it.  About a year ago, Felicity was transferred from her regular Nephrologist (kidney doc)  to a new one that joined the clinic.  I remember clearly the day that we went to her office; I was so angry that we were having to change docs and didn’t go into her office with a very good attitude.  Then we met her; she was such a kind woman, very gentle and seemed to truly care about what we had to say…she won my heart!  Then last year, in March, we were told that Felicity had Lupus.  We researched it and learned what we could do to help her and what we could do with the “hand we were dealt”.  In August we went back to the Nephrologist and she could tell that I was very upset about Felicity’s health and still felt like something just wasn’t right.  She then called a Rheumatologist and made sure we got in and explained our situation.  We went into the Rheumatologist and again, got a doc who was sent straight from heaven!  She took an hour and half with us; she listened to 6 ½ years of medical history and every detail that I thought would be helpful.  Then she said something that I will never forget…she said “Felicity doesn’t have Lupus!  She has all of the signs and symptoms, but doesn’t follow a single pattern.  I think she has Celiac Disease and this is what I want you to do…”  And the rest is history, we took gluten out of her diet and we began to see changes right away!  Her hair stopped falling out, she started gaining weight again, her joints didn’t hurt so bad; this winter, instead of living at the hospital for various illnesses, she only got sick once!  The changes were unbelievable!  For years Dale and I said that we only needed 1 doctor to listen to us and take us seriously…just 1; even if that doc didn’t treat the thing that was “wrong” with Felicity.  That change in doctors at the Nephrologist was our answer to prayers; she was the one who showed us that the “light at the end of the tunnel” hadn’t gone out…we were just on a curve and couldn’t see it!  Last week, Felicity went to her Neurologist and they told us that perhaps her migraines were caused by the Celiac and we can start weaning her off of her migraine meds; by Christmas she could be off of all of her migraine meds!  Today, we went to the Nephrologist and she too, said that Felicity can start decreasing her blood pressure meds and that her labs showed that her kidneys are 100% healthy!

Now, not everyone’s “light at the end” will take 6 ½ years and not everyone will have to go through what we have to get there, but the message that I want to send in this is that the “light at the end of the tunnel” hasn’t burned out; it is still there!  You may just be rounding a curve that is blocking the vision of the light!  My message to you is HOLD ON and DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK!  I sit here writing this and thinking what would have happened if we hadn’t held on or if we had gotten too afraid of the dark to keep moving forward…that to me is even scarier than what we have gone through.  God is your light!  HE isn’t going anywhere, you may just be rounding a corner and can’t see the light shining!  BUT, if you keep holding on and keep walking through, rather than allowing the temporary darkness to paralyze you with fear, then you will get to the light at the end!  There is a part of scripture that I always tell myself and others when faced with something that causes fear, “God has not brought a spirit of fear, but of peace and of a sound mind.”  To me, what this says is that we should look to God for strength when we are faced with situations that bring fear.  It also tells me that if God didn’t bring a spirit of fear then that means that the enemy did bring it!  The enemy will do whatever he can to block your view of “the light” and cause you to be paralyzed in fear!  We cannot allow the enemy to do that!  Keep moving forward and keep heading towards where you know in your heart that light is!  Joyce Meyer has said before that sometimes you just have to do it afraid, but no matter what…just do it!  For years we were afraid of what might be wrong with Felicity, but we walked through that fear and came to where we are today!  Celiac isn’t a serious disease…it just means she can’t eat the same foods as everyone else; that is FAR less scary than all of the things we have been told was wrong with her!  And the best part…we have had the privilege of ministering to so many people as we walked through the darkness!  That is the great part about not allowing fear and darkness to paralyze you…there are people along the path to cheer you on, to help you, and that NEED YOU to help cheer them on in their journey!   Our hardships are NEVER for nothing…they are ALWAYS to bring people together, help each other and ultimately lead others to their “Light”! 

Are you allowing the darkness to paralyze you?  It isn’t too late…you know what direction the light is…just take the first step towards that light and grab hold of the people along the way that are cheering you on!  You have your own “fan club” and God is the leader of it!!!  Your light is just around that curve, but if you sit still, you will never get a glimpse of it!

Thoughs on Osama bin Laden's death...

I had determined that I wasn’t going to write about this topic because I am not 100% sure how I feel about it all.  Let’s be real though, people are talking about it and so I wanted to share some thoughts, even though they are mixed thoughts!  Let’s talk about the US killing Osama bin Laden!

I hate, like every other American, what he did in sending his followers to attack and kill Americans.  I am enraged at the thought of what he did on September 11, 2001.  I am thankful that the American soldiers have fought long and hard to put an end to terrorism and I believe every military man & woman and their families are heroes.  But let’s not fool ourselves; just because bin Laden is dead does not mean terrorism is dead.  I have no doubt in my mind that he knew at some point he would be captured and most likely killed.  I have no doubt that he took the time to train his leaders on what to do when that time came.  I also have no doubt that they are in the process of carrying out the next “phase” of attack.

Am I glad that Osama bin Laden is dead?  That, my friend, is a tough one.  Am I glad that the leader of terrorism is not able to terrorize anymore?  Yes, I am.  Am I glad that he is dead?  I just don’t know how to answer that.  I firmly believe that God cannot stand when people murder; I believe that He would prefer there not be war, but He is God and knows that sometimes it is necessary.  I also believe that God doesn’t want anyone to go to hell…even Osama bin Laden!  God sent His Son to die for EVERYONE; not just the people who do good or change.  God NEVER put a condition on His love nor did He place a condition on who His Son would and would not die for!  Yes, there were wars in Bible times, but that doesn’t mean that God liked it; there were evil people in Bible times too and God didn’t hate them!  The Bible talks about the end times and there being wars; so I firmly believe that this is something that was already talked about in the Bible, but that does not mean that God enjoyed it.

The Bible tells us that we are to love EVERYONE; especially our enemies!  We are to pray blessing over those who persecute us.  Is it easy?  Not in anyway.  Do I think that Osama should have died for what he did?  I believe that he definitely should have been punished for his crimes and death was the method in which it happened.  That doesn’t mean I think we should or shouldn’t have killed him and it doesn’t mean that I don’t respect and honor our troops.  In fact, I am thankful every day for those men and women who fight so that I can be a mom, wife, business woman and Christian!

 1 John 2:9-11  “Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates his brother is still in the darkness.  Whoever loves his brother lives in the light, and there is nothing in him to make him stumble.  But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness; he does not know where he is going, because the darkness had blinded him.”

Matthew 5:43-48  “You have heard that it has been said, ‘Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hat thine enemy’.  But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you , and persecute you;  that ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.  For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye?  Do not even the publicans the same?  And if ye salute your bretheren only, what do ye more than others?  Do not even the publicans so?  Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.” 

1 John 4:20-21  “If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar.  For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.  And he has given up this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother.”

These are just three passages of scripture that I found about loving our enemies.  Notice that in NONE of these does God command us to agree with what our enemies do and pat them on the back for a good job destroying us; He simply commands us to love them!  God doesn’t look at sin and wrong doing and say “This one was really bad, this one was bad but not too bad, this one can slide.”  Sin is sin and it is all wrong and all treated the same.  God hates lying as much as He hates murder.  Yes, Osama bin Laden carried out a very horrific and tragic thing; but he is still God’s child and God is saddened by the lie Osama chose to live and He is saddened that another one of His children must now spend eternity in hell.

That doesn’t make what bin Laden did any less horrible.  But hating him and rejoicing in his death only means that we have stooped to the level of the people that Osama trained to do evil things; it means that we have, according to the Word of God, murdered in our hearts!

I know that we all have mixed feelings about this and it is good to know that Osama bin Laden can no longer hurt anyone; but the bottom line is…a mamma’s son died, a child’s daddy is gone and a wife grieves the loss of her husband.  Yes, our soldiers died in this fight and I have no doubt that, sadly, more will.  But if we take a moment and view Osama bin Laden as God does…Osama was a son, a daddy, a husband, a child that God created!

I hate terrorism; I hate that ANYONE has had to lose their life; I hate that the World is in such turmoil; I hate that someone has to spend eternity in hell because he made very bad choices.  God’s heart is grieved that another soul is in hell…when God’s heart is grieved, ours should be too!

I know I will get a lot of flak from this blog and quite frankly…I don’t care.  I said what was on my heart and what I believe I was supposed to say.  If that makes for some haters…then so be it; the day I shut my mouth when God places something on my heart is the day I have given in to disobedience to my Father who paid the ultimate price for my life!