Recent conversations in our home have prompted me to write this blog. I do have two girls in my home, plus me, and I must say that I get angry sometimes at the thought of what society mentally and emotionally does to the young girls living in this society. Our society plagues magazines, television and all forms of media with images of women who are super skinny, perfect skin and beautifully done make-up. What they fail to tell the young girls who look at these images, with longing in their eyes to be just like the girls in the magazines, is that these images are edited, brushed up and often those that are honestly that skinny are not necessarily healthy!
As a teenage girl, I personally struggled with this. My pants were a size 14, I wore glasses and barely any make-up and felt like the biggest nerd on the planet. Mostly without my family knowing, I literally struggled with food. I tried desperately to be the “perfect” girl in hopes that just one guy would like me or for a just one second I could be popular! Even as an adult, once I got contacts, was skinnier and figured out how to apply make-up…I still struggled with my image. Yes, today I still do a bit…today we went to White Water and I definitely put mascara on to at least have something on my face! However, I have also learned that I am beautiful just because God made me! I guess a huge part of looking at myself differently came when I gave birth to a beautiful little girl. The first thing I felt was joy, but as she grew older the more I realized that I had a HUGE job ahead. It was my responsibility to show my daughter that society’s image is NOT the correct image. At the age of 14 she wears very little make-up and even then I am very particular as to what colors she wears and how often. I have already had to fight with the mental thoughts of her feeling overweight or not as “pretty” as her friends. Really, I don’t know how I managed to get her this far with a great self-image except that I busted my tail to show her through example that what other’s think doesn’t matter…God made her perfect!
Now, as we have another beautiful daughter living in our house (no I didn’t give birth…she’s 20) I have realized once again how easy it is for young girls to fall into the trap of society’s perspective of what beautiful is. Yes, those models look beautiful in their size 4 little outfits, but what girls fail to understand is that most of these girls are the least healthy. There is a difference between being super skinny and being healthy….sometimes; I don’t for one second think that every skinny girl is unhealthy so please don’t take that wrong. But if we really take a look at these ultra-skinny gals that society wants our young girls to view as “perfect” we will actually see girls who struggle with image, starve themselves and overall are not truly happy or healthy! How sad is it, then, that our society tries to tell our daughters that they NEED to be just like that.
One of my girls recently said that she felt like she was fat…that broke my heart, because anyone you ask would say she is thin and beautiful. I had to break it down for her that she isn’t fat…she is healthy and that she wasn’t before when she was thinner. She is constantly checking her make-up and reapplying and I am constantly trying to give positive reinforcement that what she is doing isn’t necessary. I am sure I drive her insane…she’ll get over it, but what I will not stand for is any of my girls to fall prey to society’s image of beautiful.
The Bible says that we are “fearfully and WONDERFULLY made”. God doesn’t make mistakes and there are no accidents. We were each set on this Earth exactly the way God wanted us to look. By saying we are anything less than the perfect image is to say that God made a mistake and God is perfect so mistakes in His creation are impossible.
I guess to close this off I just want to say
Daddy’s: Tell you daughters DAILY that they are beautiful. Pick out something about their appearance that you just love about them and that makes THEM special!
Momma’s: Show your daughters that it is ok to go out in public without make-up! Teach them about a positive and healthy image and constantly, yes it is a constant job, build up their self-image!
Friends: Quit telling each other that you would be prettier “if” and start accepting each other the way God made you!
I told my girls just yesterday that we are going to have a day where make-up isn’t allowed! Not because I don’t like make-up, but because I think we all need a reminder that we are beautiful just the way God made us and we are “fearfully and wonderfully made”!
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